Jasmine
My flight was being served by a gay flight attendant, who was camping it up outrageously.
He seemed to put everyone in a good mood as he served us food and drinks.
As the plane prepared to descend, he came swishing down the aisle and told us: ”Captain Marvey has asked me to announce that he’ll be landing the big scary plane shortly, so lovely people, if you could just put your trays up, that would be super.”
On his trip back up the aisle, he noticed an extremely well-dressed and exotic young woman hadn’t moved a muscle.
“Perhaps you didn’t hear me over those big brute engines but I asked you to raise your tray, so the main man can pitty-pat us on the ground.”
She calmly turned her head and said, “In my country, I am called a Princess and I take orders from no one.”
To which the flight attendant replied, without missing a beat:
“Well, sweet-cheeks, in my country I’m called a Queen, so I outrank you. Tray up, Bitch.”
Woman Made Fun Of This Kid’s Prayer
Last week, when I took my kids to a restaurant, my six-year-old son asked if he could say grace.
We bowed our head and he started, “God is good. God is great. Thank you for the food and I would thank you even more if Mom gets us ice cream for dessert. And Justice and Liberty for all! Amen!”
All the other customers were laughing and I heard a woman said, “That’s what’s wrong with this country. Kids today don’t even know how to pray. Asking God for ice-cream! Why I never!”
My son started to cry and asked me, “Did I do it wrong? Is God mad at me?”
I held him and said that he did a great job and God was certainly not mad at him. Then an elderly gentleman approached the table, winked at my son, and said:
“I happen to know that God thought that was a great prayer.”
“Really?” my son asked.
The man said, “Cross my heart.”
He said in a theatrical whisper by indicating the woman whose remark had started this whole thing, “Too bad she never asks God for ice cream. Sometimes, a little ice cream is good for the soul.”
At the end of the meal, I bought ice cream for my kids. My little son stared at the ice cream and did something I would never forget in my lifetime.
Without a word, he picked up his sundae and walked over and placed it in front of that woman. He told her with a big smile, “Here, this is for you. Ice cream is good for the soul sometimes, and my soul is good already.”
Brilliant!
Hope this funny story will make you smile! Have a nice day!!