Jasmine
A lady went to the bar on a cruise ship and ordered a Scotch with two drops of water.
The bartender gave her the drink and she said, “I’m on this cruise to celebrate my 80th birthday and it’s today.”
The bartender said, “Now that it’s your birthday, this one’s on me.”
When the lady finished her drink, a woman to her right said, “I want to buy you a drink too.”
The lady said, “Thank you, how sweet of you. Okay, bartender, I’d like another Scotch with two drops of water. ”
“Coming up,” said the bartender.
When she finished drinking, a man to her left said, “I want to buy you a drink too.”
The lady said, “Thank you very much, my dear. Bartender, I’ll have another Scotch with two drops of water. ”
“Coming right up,” the bartender said.
When he gave her the drink, this time, he said, “Ma’am, I’m dying of curiosity. Why the Scotch with only two drops of water?”
The old woman giggled, and replied, “Sonny, when you’re my age, you’ve learned how to hold your liquor. Water, however, is a whole other issue.”
LOL!!
Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!!
An old lady wanted to visit England
An old lady really wanted to visit England, the home of her ancestors, before she died.
So she went to the Federal Office and asked for a passport.
“You must take the loyalty oath first,” the passport clerk said.
“Raise your right hand, please.”
The old gal raised her right hand.
“Do you swear to defend the Constitution of the United States against all its e-n.emies, domestic or foreign?”
The sweet old face paled and the voice trembled as she responded, “Well, I guess so, but. . . Will I have help, or will I have to do it all by myself?”
LOL!!
Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!!