Lily
Two blondes were repairing a roof, with one working on one side and one on the other.
After a while, one blonde noticed that her friend would carefully examine each nail before hammering it down, but half of the time she would toss the nail behind her after examining it.
Figuring that there couldn’t be that many bad nails, she yelled out to her friend: “Why are you tossing out all those nails?”
“Well, those were all pointing the wrong way!” was the response.
Infuriated, the first blonde bellowed “You, idiot! Those are for my side of the roof!!”
Two Roofers, Bob and Dan,
were putting a new roof on a barn when a bundle of shingles slid down the slope and knocked the ladder over.
Bob and Dan decided since it was early they would continue working because someone would surely come around by quitting time.
It was nearing 5 PM and they hadn’t seen hide nor hair of anyone.
So, they walked around the roof a few times and finally decided there was only one way down.
On the West side of the barn was a big manure pile.
Bob says, “It’s the only way down. I will go first.” Bob jumped.
Dan heard the squishy landing and yelled, “Hey Bob! How deep did you go?”
Bob yells back, “I went to my ankles Dan, come on JUMP!”
Dan jumps… and sinks clear up to his neck in manure! “I thought when you jumped you went up to your ankles?” He shouts at his friend.
“I did…” Explained Bob, “but I landed head first!”
There’s this blonde out for a walk.
She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank.
“Hey” she shouts, “how can I get to the other side?”
The second blonde looks up the river then down the river then shouts back,
“You are already on the other side.”