Bean
A small boy is sent to bed by his father…
Five minutes later:
“Da-ad…”
“What?”
“I’m thirsty. Can you bring me a drink of water?”
“No. You had your chance. Lights out.”
Five minutes later:
“Da-ad…”
“WHAT?”
“I’m THIRSTY… Can I have a drink of water?”
“I told you NO! If you ask again I’ll have to spank you!”
Five minutes later:
“Daaad…”
“WHAT?!”
“When you come in to spank me, can you bring me a drink of water?”
===========================
A Suddenly Call From Father.
“Hello. Hi Honey. This is daddy. Is mommy near the phone?”
“No daddy. She is upstairs in the bedroom with uncle Paul.”
After a short pause, daddy says: “but honey, you don’t have an uncle Paul.”
“Oh yes, mommy says I do and he is upstairs with mommy in the bedroom right now.”
After a short time daddy says: “Okay, then this is what I want you to do. Put the phone down on the table, run upstairs and knock on the bedroom door and scream that daddy’s car just pulled into the driveway.”
“Okay daddy, just a minute.”
A few minutes later the little girl comes back on the phone.
“I did it, daddy.”
“And what happened honey?” daddy asked.
“Well, mommy got all scared, jumped out of the bed with no clothes on, and ran around screaming. Then she tripped over the rug, hit her head on the dresser and now she isn’t moving at all.”
“Oh my God!!!! And what happened to your uncle Paul?”
“He jumped out of the bed with no clothes on, too. He was all scared and he jumped out of the back window and into the swimming pool. But I guess he didn’t know that you took out the water last week and cleaned it. He hit the bottom of the pool and I think he is dead.”
*Long pause …*
The daddy says,
“Swimming pool? …. Is this 486-5731?”