A 71-year-old man is having a drink in a Chicago bar.

A 71-year-old man is having a drink in a Chicago bar.

A 71-year-old man drinks a drink in a Chicago bar and a beautiful 19-year-old girl comes in and takes a few seats.

The girl is so attractive that he just can not keep his eyes from her. Shortly after, the girl realizes that she is looking at him and approaching him.

Before the man has time to apologize, the girl looks him deep in the eyes and says to him in a sultry tone:

“I’ll do anything you’d like. Anything you can imagine in your wildest dreams, it doesn’t matter how extreme or unusual it is, I’m game. I want 100 dollars, and there’s another condition”.

Completely stunned by the sudden turn of events, the man asks her what her condition is.

“You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words.”

The man takes a moment to examine the offer of the beautiful woman. Then he takes out his wallet and puts ten ten-dollar bills in his hands.

He then looks her square in the eye, and says slowly and clearly:
“Paint my house.”

======================

The best gift ever

The best gift ever

A woman has to go to Italy for a conference, so her husband drives her to the airport.

“Thank you, honey,” she says, “Is there anything I can bring back for you?”
He laughs, and says, “An Italian girl!”
When the conference is over, he meets her up at the airport and asks, “How was the
“Very good,” she replies.
“And what happened to my present?”
“Which present?” she asks.
“The one I asked for – an Italian girl!”
“Oh, that. I did what I could. We’ll just have to wait 9 months to see if it’s a girl.”