Man had an accident involving a bus

Patient: ” I’m in a hospital! Why am I in here?”

Doctor: “You’ve had an accident involving a bus.”

Patient: “What happened?”

Doctor: “Well, I’ve got some good news and some bad news Which would you like to hear first?”

Patient: “Give me the bad news first.”

Doctor: “Your legs were injured so badly that we had to amputate both of them.”

Patient: “That’s terrible! What’s the good news?”

Doctor: “There’s a guy in the next ward who made a very good offer on your slippers.”


A blonde goes into work one morning crying her eyes out.

A blonde goes into work one morning crying her eyes out.

Her boss, concerned about his employee’s well-being, asks sympathetically, “What’s the matter?”

The blonde replies, “Early this morning I got a phone call saying that my mother had passed away.”

“I’m terribly sorry to hear that. Why don’t you go home for the day… we aren’t terribly busy.

Just take the day off to relax and rest.”

The blonde very calmly explains, “No, I’d be better off here.
I need to keep my mind off it and I have the best chance of doing that here.”

The boss agrees and allows the blonde to work as usual.

“If you need anything, just let me know,” he says. A few hours pass and the boss decides to check on the blonde.

He looks out over his office and sees the blonde crying hysterically.

He rushes out to her, and asks, “Are you going to be okay?
Is there anything I can do to help?”

“No,” replies the blonde,

“I just got a call from my sister, and she said that HER mom died too!”

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