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Little Johnny and his hammer

Little Johnny comes downstairs crying. His mother asked, “What’s the matter now?”

“Dad was hanging pictures, and just hit his thumb with a hammer,” said little Johnny through his tears.

“That’s not so serious,” soothed his mother. “I know you are upset, but a big boy like you shouldn’t cry at something like that. Why didn’t you just laugh?

“I did!” sobbed Johnny.

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A blonde comes home from a day of shopping and discovers that her house is on fire

 

A blonde comes home from a day of shopping and discovers that her house is on fire, so she calls the fire department on her cell phone.

“Please state the nature of your emergency,” says the operator.

“Help! My house is on fire!” the blonde replies.

“Okay, where do you live?”

“In a house you silly billy!” the blonde replies.

“No, no! How do we get there?” the operator asks frustratedly.
“Duh! Big Red Truck!!”

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