1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me alone.
2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt or a leaky tire.
3. It’s always darkest before dawn, so if you’re going to steal your neighbour’s newspaper, that’s the time to do it.
4. Don’t be irreplaceable. If you can’t be replaced, you can’t be promoted.
5. Always remember that you’re unique. Just like everyone else.
6. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
7. If you think nobody cares when you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
8. Before you criticise someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticise them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes.
9. If at first you don’t succeed… Skydiving is not for you.
A man boarded a plane with six kids and got settled into their seats.
A woman sitting across the aisle leans over and says,
“Excuse me sir but are these your kids?”
To which he replied,