A dad buys a lie detector robot that slaps you if you lie.
Dad: Son, where were you at school hours?
Son: At school. The robot slaps the son.
Son: Okay I was watching Kungfu Panda! The robot slaps his son again.
Son: Okay I was watching vi…o…lent movies!
Dad: What?! When I was your age I never watched those kinds of movies! The robot slaps the dad.
Mom: Haha, after all, he is your son. The robot slaps the mom…
A blind man wants to tell a joke about blondes
A blind man walks into a bar, goes to the barstool, and orders a drink. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender. “Hey, You wanna hear a blonde joke?”
The bar immediately falls absolutely quiet. The woman next to him said in a very deep and husky voice, “Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it is only fair that you should know five things.
Number One. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.
Number Two. The bouncer is a blonde girl.
Number Three. I’m a six-foot-tall, 175 lb. Blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
Number Four. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weightlifter.
Number Five. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.
She concludes by smugly asking, “Now think about it seriously, mister.
Do you still wanna tell that joke?”
The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head, and mutters, “Nah, not if I’m gonna have to explain it five times.”
What will happen after he telling the story?
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