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A student called into school as his father.

A student called into school as his father in the hopes of getting out of school that day.

“My son had the flu and can’t make it to school today,” he said.

“Who is this speaking,” said the secretary.

“This is my father!”

My daughter hates school.

One weekend, she cried and fretted and tried every excuse not to go back on Monday.

Sunday morning on the way home from brunch, the crying and whining built to a crescendo.

At the end of my rope, I finally stopped the car and explained, “Honey, it’s a law. If you don’t go to school, they’ll put daddy in jail.”

She looked at me, thought for a moment, then asked, “How long would you have to stay?”

While having their evening dinner together,

a little girl looked up at her father and asked,

“Daddy, you’re the boss in our family, right?”

The father was very pleased to hear it and confidently replied, “Yes my little princess.”

The girl then continued, “That’s because mommy put you in charge, right?”

Father: Which one do you love more, me or Mommy?

Son: I love you both.

Father: Very Well, lets say I went to Japan and Mommy went to France which country will you go to?

Son: Japan.

Father: See, that you love Mommy more than me?

Son: No, I just want to visit Japan.

Father: Very well, lets say I went to Japan and Mommy went to France which country will you go to?

Son: France.

Father: See?

Son: No its just because I have already visited Japan.

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