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A horse walks up to the bartender

A horse walks into a bar.

He goes to the bartender and says “Give me a beer.”

The bartender is stunned.

He heads to the back of the bar to speak to his boss.

“Hey boss,” he says, “there’s a horse in the bar asking for a beer.”

The bar owner pauses for a second, then replies “Well then give him one, but charge him double. Horses don’t know the price of beer.”

So the bartender heads back out front and hands the horse a beer.

“You know,” says the barkeep, “we don’t get many horses around here.”

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To which the horse replies, “At these prices, I’m not surprised.”

A man walks into a barbershop and says

A man walks into a barbershop and says, “I’ll have a shave and a shoeshine.”

The barber lathers his face and sharpens the straight edge while a gorgeous woman kneels down and shines his shoes.

The man says, “Hi there. You know, would you like to spend time with me in a nice place.”

She replies, “My husband wouldn’t like that.”

The man says, “Tell him you’re working overtime, I’ll give you more money”

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She says, “You tell him. He’s the one shaving you.”

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