Bean
A new blonde hostess has started her first day. The route they took required them to stop in another town for the night.
Soon after their arrival, the captain showed all the flight attendants to their rooms.
The next morning the pilot was preparing everyone to leave, and he noticed his new flight attendant was missing.
He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up, as he was wondering what happened to her.
She answered the phone, sobbing. “I can’t get out of my room!”
“You can’t get out of your room?” the captain asked, “Why not?”
The stewardess replied, “There are only three doors in here,” she cried, “one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says, ‘Do Not Disturb?!”
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Revenge of the Melon Farmer
There was a farmer who grew watermelons. He was doing pretty well but was bothered by local kids sneaking into his watermelon field at night and eating his watermelons.
After some thought, he had the clever idea that he would definitely scare children. He made up a sign and posted it in the field.
The next night, the kids showed up and they saw the sign which read, “Wa.r.ning! One of the watermelons in this field has been injected with cyanide.”
The kids ran off, made up their own sign, and posted it next to the farmers.
When the farmer returned, he surveyed the field. He noticed that no watermelons were missing, but the sign next to his read: “Now there are two!”