A 7-year-old child is sitting on a park bench eating a chocolate bar.
The man sitting next to him looks over and says, “Eating so many chocolate bars is bad for you.”
The boy looks over and replies, “My great-grandfather lived to be one hundred and five”.
The man replies, “And he ate so much chocolate?”
“No,” the boy says, “he minded his own business.
One day a boy came home running while crying.
His mother asked what happened, why are you crying?
The boy said he was punished for something he didn’t do.
Her mother said, “That’s horrible. What did you not do?”
The boy said in tears, “My homework.”
Man: “How old is your father?”
Boy: “As old as me.”
Man: “How can that be?”
Boy: “He became a father only when I was born.”
The nurse told the parents of a newborn baby, “You have a cute baby.”
The smiling husband said, “I bet you say that to all new parents.”
“No,” she replied, “just to those whose babies really are good-looking.”
The husband asked again, “So what do you say to the others?”
The nurse replied, “The baby looks like you.”
A young boy gave his mother a big birthday present on a Saturday.
She opened it and it was a teapot.
She said, “What a wonderful tea port darling – thank you.”
The boy said, “That’s good.”
Mom said, “I already have a teapot, though.”
The boy replied, “No you haven’t – I broke it.”