Bean
Maria was in a loving marriage, and she was happy with her life. However, she had started to suspect that something was very wrong.
Everyone in her and her husband’s family had dark hair, but their 9-year-old daughter’s hair was bright red. After thinking about it for a while, she finally decided to get a DNA test for their child.
When she got the results back, she was s.h.o.c..ked to see that her husband wasn’t the father – and she wasn’t the mother! Their daughter was from completely different parents.
Maria spent the afternoon thinking about how she would break the news to her husband. Nothing would ever be the same again. Finally, she decided to just tell him as he was watching football.
She said to him, “Honey, I have something very serious to tell you.”
He replied, “What’s up?”
“Well, according to the DNA test results, we’re not our daughter’s parents.”
Her husband replied, “You silly goose, of course, we aren’t!”
Maria looked at him, stunned and confused.
Her husband continued, “Well, don’t you remember? When we were leaving the hospital, we noticed that our baby had pooped. You said: ‘Please go change the baby, I’ll wait for you here.’”
The wife fainted!
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The half owner
A very successful businessman had a meeting with his new son-in-law.
“I welcome you into the family!” said the man.
“To show you how much we care for you, I am making you a 50-50 partner in my business. All you have to do is go to the factory every day and learn the operation.”
The son-in-law interrupted. “I hate factories. I can’t stand the noise.’
“I see,” replied the father-in-law.
“Well, then you’ll work in the office and take charge of some of the operations.”
“I hate office work,” said the son-in-law. “I can’t stand being stuck behind a desk.”
“Wait a minute,” said the father-in-law.
“I just made you half-owner of a money-making industry, but you don’t like factories, and won’t work in an office. What am I going to do with you?”
“Easy,” said the son-in-law. “Buy me out.”