Bean
Many years ago, two cowboys came upon a Native American lying on his stomach with his ear to the ground.
One of the cowboys stops and says to the other, “You see that Indian?”
“Yeah,” says the other cowboy.
“Look,” says the first one, “he’s listening to the ground. He can hear things for miles in any direction.”
Just then the Native American looks up.
“Covered wagon,” he says, “about two miles away. Have two horses, one brown, one white. Man, woman, child, household effects in wagon.”
“Incredible!” says the cowboy to his friend. “This Indian knows how far away they are, how many horses, what color they are, who is in the wagon, and what is in the wagon. Remarkable!”
The Native looks up weakly and says, “Ran over me about a half-hour ago.”
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The Best Blonde Joke Ever
80,000 blondes gather in a football stadium for a “Blondes Are Not Stupid” Convention.
The leader says, “We are all here today to prove to the world that blondes are not stupid. Can I have a volunteer?”
A blonde pushes her way through the crowd and takes the stage.
The leader asks her, “What is 15 plus 15?”
After 15 to 20 seconds she says, “Eighteen!”
Obviously, everyone is a bit disappointed. Then 80,000 blondes start to clap: “Give her another chance! Give her another chance!”
The leader says, “Now that we have made the effort to bring together 80,000 of you in one place, and we have the world-wide press and global broadcast media here, uh, I guess we can give her another chance.”
So he asks, “What is 5 plus 5?”
After almost 30 seconds, she finally said, “Ninety?”
The leader is quite perplexed, looks down, and just lets out a dejected sigh. Everyone is discouraged – the blonde starts crying and the 80,000 girls start screaming, waving their hands and shouting, “Give her another chance! Give her another chance! ”
The leader, unsure of whether or not he is doing more harm than good, eventually says, “OK! OK! Just one more chance – what is 2 plus 2?”
The girl closes her eyes and after a whole minute finally says, “Four?”
Throughout the stadium, pandemonium breaks out as all 80,000 girls jump to their feet, wave their arms, stomp their feet, and scream…
“Give her another chance! Give her another chance!”
LOL!
Hope this joke will make you smile!