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Man Gets Fired from Job at Walmart

After getting my new job as a Walmart greeter, a great find for many retirees, I lasted less than a day.

About two hours into my first day on the job, a very loud, mean-acting woman walked into the store with her two children and yelled obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.

I said pleasantly, “Good morning, and welcome to Wal-Mart. You have nice children there. Are they twins?”

The woman stopped yelling long enough to say, “Damn no, they’re not twins. The older 9 and the other 7. Why the hell do you think they’re twins? are you blind or stupid?”

So I said, “I’m not blind or stupid Ma’am, I just couldn’t believe someone s-l.ept with you twice. Have a nice day and thank you for shopping at Walmart.”

My supervisor said I probably wasn’t cut out for this line of work.

LOL!!

Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!!

Johnny Looking For A New Job

Little Johnny walks into a general store, goes to the owner, and asks for a new job.

The owner says, “Do you think you are a good salesman?”

Little Johnny says, “I don’t know. I think so.”

The owner says, “I’ll tell you what. The next customer comes in, you watch me. If you think you can do what I’m doing, you’ve got a new job!”

A customer comes in a few minutes later.

The owner says, “Can I help you?”

The customer says, “Yes. I want to buy a bag of grass seed.”

“No problem,” Says the owner looking for a bag of grass seed. “Do you think you might want a lawnmower with that?”

“Lawnmower?” says the customer

“Yes,” Says the owner. “If you plant that grass seed, you’re gonna have a lot of grass to cut. You may also want to buy a lawnmower too.”

The customer thinks it’s a great idea and accepts.

The owner sells him the grass seeds and the lawnmower, and the customer leaves.

The owner turns to Little Johnny and says, “See that? That’s selling! The guy wanted some grass seeds and I sold him a lawnmower too! Do you think you can do that?”

Little Johnny says, “Yeah, he can do that.”

So the owner says, “Great. The next customer who comes in is yours. I will just stand here quietly and watch. We will see how you do. ”

A few minutes pass by and another customer enters.

Little Johnny says, “Can I help you?”

The customer says, “Yes. I want to buy a box of T-a.mpax for my wife.”

“No problem,” says Little Johnny as he reaches for the box of T-a.mpax.

“Do you think you might want a lawnmower with that?”

“Lawnmower?” says the customer.

“Yeah,” says Little Johnny.

“You’re not going to be doing anything else for the next 7 days, you might as well cut the grass!”

LOL!!!

Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!

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