Kung Fu student asks his teacher.

Kung Fu student asks his teacher, “Master, why does my ability not improve? I’m always defeated.”

And the master, pensive and forever patient, answers, “My dear pupil, have you seen the gulls flying by the setting sun, and their wings seeming like flames?”

“Yes, my master, I have.”

“And a waterfall, spilling mightily over the stones without taking anything out of its proper place?”

“Yes, my master, I have witnessed it.”

And the moon… when it touches the calm water to reflect all its enormous beauty?”

“Yes, my master, I have also seen this marvelous phenomenon.”



“That is the problem. You keep watching all this poop instead of training!”

All you can drink for a dime

A kid sets up a lemonade stand in front of his house, with a sign that says, “All you can drink for a dime.”

Before too long, a man happens by, sees the sign, and thinks it’s a good deal. He gives the kid a dime and the kid hands him a cup.

The man tosses it back and says, “Hey, that was pretty good. I’ll have another.”

The kid says, “That’ll be another dime.”

“Now wait a minute,” says the man, “your sign says ‘all I can drink for a dime.’”

“But you just had a cup, didn’t you?” asked the kid.




“Well, that’s all you can drink for a dime.”

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