I was drinking my coffee when a beautiful girl asked me if I was alone

I was drinking my coffee in a coffeehouse when a beautiful girl came near my table and asked me:

“Are you alone?”

So I responded: “It’s a long time that I’m alone.”

“So do you mind me to take this chair?” said the girl.

I fainted…

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A man walks into a bar and order a beer.

One night a man walks into a bar looking sad. The bartender asks the man what he wants.

The man says “Oh just a beer”.

The bartender asked the man “Whats wrong, why are you so down today?”.

The man said “My wife and i got into a fight, and she said she wouldn’t talk to me for a month”.

The bartender said “So whats wrong with that”?

The man said “Well the month is up tonight”.