Jasmine
A man and his dog walk into a pub.
The landlord said, “Sorry, we don’t allow pets in here.”
The man replied, “But my dog can talk. Will you let him in if he talks?”
The landlord chuckled, and shook his head saying, “Yeah, sure, why not?”
The man looked at his dog and smiled, “Alright! What’s on the outside of a tree?”
The dog said, “Bark”.
“What’s on top of a house?”, he asked next.
“Roof!” the dog responded.
“What’s the opposite of smooth?”, he finally said.
“Ruff! said the dog.
The landlord snapped and stamped his feet on the ground saying, “That’s it. Get out of my bar.”
The man sighed and walked out of the bar with his dog.
Outside the pub, the man shouted at the dog saying, “What the hell was that?!”
“Yeah, I know, I’m sorry,” the dog said.
LOL!!
Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!!
A man walks into a a bar, and drinks a couple of beers
A man walks into a bar, drinks a couple of beers, and prepares to leave.
The bartender tells him that he owes $8.
“But I already paid you. Don’t you remember?” says the customer.
“Okay,” says the bartender, “if you say you paid, then I suppose you did.”
The man goes outside and tells the first person he sees that the bartender can’t keep track of whether his customers have paid or not.
The second man walks in, orders a couple of beers, and later pulls the same stunt.
The bartender replies, “OK, if you say you paid, then I suppose you did.”
The customer goes outside and tells a friend how to get free drinks.
The man interrupts, “Don’t bother me with your troubles, bartender. Just give me my change and I’ll be on my way.”
The third man hurries into the bar and begins to drink highballs.
The bartender leans over and says, “You know, something funny happened tonight. Two men drank beer, neither paid, and both claimed they had. The next guy who tries that stunt is going to get punched in the — ”
The man interrupts, “Do not bother me with your troubles, bartender. Just give me my change and I’ll be on my way.”
LOL!!
Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!!