Jasmine
A man and a monkey walk into a bar.
The man sits down and orders a beer. The monkey jumps on the bar and eats a very old olive that was there.
The bartender says, “Did you see what your monkey did? He ate that disgusting olive!”
The man says, “Oh, he does stuff like that all the time. Just ignore it.”
The man finishes his beer and he and the monkey leave.
A few days later the man and the monkey return to the bar. The man sits down and orders a beer. The monkey jumps on the pool table and swallows the white ball.
The bartender says, “Did you see what your monkey did? He swallowed the white ball!”
The man says, “Oh, he does stuff like that all the time. Just ignore it.”
The man finishes his beer and he and the monkey leave.
A week later, the man and the monkey return to the bar. The man sits down and orders a beer. The monkey jumps on the bar, takes a cherry, sticks it up to his b-u.t.t, pulls it out, and eats it.
The bartender says, “This is the most disgusting thing I have ever seen. Your monkey stuck that cherry up his b-u.t.t and ate it.”
The man says, “Yes, he measures everything first ever since the white ball incident.
LOL!
Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!
A man walks into a a bar, and drinks a couple of beers
A man walks into a bar, drinks a couple of beers, and prepares to leave.
The bartender tells him that he owes $8.
“But I already paid you. Don’t you remember?” says the customer.
“Okay,” says the bartender, “if you say you paid, then I suppose you did.”
The man goes outside and tells the first person he sees that the bartender can’t keep track of whether his customers have paid or not.
The second man walks in, orders a couple of beers, and later pulls the same stunt.
The bartender replies, “OK, if you say you paid, then I suppose you did.”
The customer goes outside and tells a friend how to get free drinks.
The man interrupts, “Don’t bother me with your troubles, bartender. Just give me my change and I’ll be on my way.”
The third man hurries into the bar and begins to drink highballs.
The bartender leans over and says, “You know, something funny happened tonight. Two men drank beer, neither paid, and both claimed they had. The next guy who tries that stunt is going to get punched in the — ”
The man interrupts, “Do not bother me with your troubles, bartender. Just give me my change and I’ll be on my way.”
LOL!!
Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!!