Jasmine
A lady went to the bar on a cruise ship and ordered a Scotch with two drops of water.
The bartender gave her the drink and she said, “I’m on this cruise to celebrate my 80th birthday and it’s today.”
The bartender said, “Now that it’s your birthday, this one’s on me.”
When the lady finished her drink, a woman to her right said, “I want to buy you a drink too.”
The lady said, “Thank you, how sweet of you. Okay, bartender, I’d like another Scotch with two drops of water. ”
“Coming up,” said the bartender.
When she finished drinking, a man to her left said, “I want to buy you a drink too.”
The lady said, “Thank you very much, my dear. Bartender, I’ll have another Scotch with two drops of water. ”
“Coming right up,” the bartender said.
When he gave her the drink, this time, he said, “Ma’am, I’m dying of curiosity. Why the Scotch with only two drops of water?”
The old woman giggled, and replied, “Sonny, when you’re my age, you’ve learned how to hold your liquor. Water, however, is a whole other issue.”
LOL!!
Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!!
A Man Walks Into A Bar
A man walks into a bar and orders a drink.
The bartender gives the man his drink and the man asks, “If I show you something crazy, would I have free drinks for the rest of the night?”
The bartender thinks for a minute and then says, “It would to be something spectacular to take that offer.”
The man leans down and picks up a box and sets it on the bar.
He opens the box and inside is a small pianist, who is only 1 foot tall, and beside him a little piano.
The pianist begins to play classical music like Beethoven and Chopin.
As soon as he’s finished, the bartender is in utter disbelief.
He said to the man, “You can get free drinks for the rest of the night, but only if you tell where you got this.”
The bartender enthusiastically walks behind his bar to see if it’s true.
The man says, “There is a Genie in the alleyway behind your bar, granting free wishes to everyone who wants them.”
A few minutes passed and out of the alleyway erupts a cacophony of quacking.
The bartender rushes back into the bar and shuts his door against a wave of thousands of ducks.
He manages to secure the door and says to the man, “I think the Genie is hard of hearing because after asking for a million dollars, thousands of these ducks appeared.”
The man laughs and says, “Did you really think I wished for a 12-inch pianist?”
LOL!
Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!